Thanksgiving Day

Mr. Kim and two brothers were broiling turkey for thanksgiving day. Everyone was thrilled with joy because it was the first time to have thanksgiving day altogether.

Eunice decorated the hallway in the house with curled ribbons. And Grace lit the candles brightly. At that time, Joy and Shalom were talking about something in the kitchen.

Joy said, "Shalom! do not put a lot of soy sauce! It's special day!" Then, Shalom said, "Don't worry. I already knew that. I am gonna put three tea spoons of soy sauce."
Joy said, "I will trust you. Let me just mix the flour slowly. The Lord will do it through us."

Becky was chalking a message on the wall. She chalked, "Jesus is worth dying for."

At night, their town was calm. Judy said, "Everybody come and let's start!" They gathered and praised the Lord. They thanked God and prayed to stand firm on His grace.

Light after Darkness

Light after darkness, Gain after loss,

Strength after weakness, Crown after cross;

Sweet after bitter, Hope after fears,

Home after wandering, Praise after tears.

It was the day like light after Darkness. This Co. jamboree was the most exciting one so far. Of course I do not have to be upset too much, it gave delight 4 of us. Miss HT. has served jamboree more that I, but we were excited together after it overed.

It was very hot day. I went to wash our clothing to the coin laundry, and I can feel humid and hot weather. However, when the birthday party for one-year-old baby started, it began to rain. Sometimes there are a few children in party. There were a lot of children as much as I could not count them, today.

Danielle has got to join us. She came to Miss HT.'s office to just bring something to her roommate, but she went with us for face painting. She has been painted face painting throughout the party. Miss HT. led many children with some games. Miss L., Grace and I played the puppets and pleased children with balloons. We were perfect team because of the great response of children. I think we played all games we can figure out. It was lasted for 3 hours. It was awesome! We were tired and sweaty but smiling. The children's excitement was our joy.

As for me, it was the first day that I talk to Miss HT and L. in English 'comfort'. Before that, I could speak a lot to them but being tensed was unavoidable. I wanted have fellowship a lot with them, in truth, Gospel. Yet it did not be naturally and my English might have been 6 years old. Even I could worry about it easily, the Lord has led me to gaze Him more and more. He gave me comfort mind from the time that I rode in the car to go to the party place. He has made me command all burden unto Himself.

We had to make the jamboree long because the food was late, but it was not a hard working since the cute children. A boy came to Miss HT, and said. "Every game is very very fun!!". lol. How cute are those children!! After we arranged all stuff, we ate things a little bit for there were no more main menus. Everybody without us in the party was very hungry. Miss HT. asked us carefully whether or not we can be with them longer. She wanted to appreciate us. So we went to eat some dessert.

It was so good and fun. Miss HT. was made up of a clown, and we went to Macdonald's. We laughed in front of the gate because people would see her and be surprised. We prepared in our mind, and entered. All people inside looked at her and their eyes got big. So we laughed for 20 min.. I was so glad to just have another unexpected meeting together. We did not talk about not so important things, but we were getting to know each other. I trust that only getting to know would be encouragement for our faith.

I could talk with her about her mother and the closest friend who passed away on the way to school again. God has done it all. It needed patience many times to hold jamboree everytime, and sometimes I could not know what was going on even I was with them in jamboree together. It would be not the end and I would need patience more but I was so glad and excited. I praise God for His answer. As I told to Miss HT, I hope it would be real help for the kingdom in them.

In His grace being vibrant by hope in Him

Everybody in G. might have been pleased for this Monday and Tuesday. By Sunday night, I was practicing for pronunciation test hard. The dictation and pronunciation test are supposed to be on Monday. At the dawn, Becky told me that we could not go to school and fell asleep, but I prepared to go. When we are having breakfast at the kitchen room, Judy came in and let us know about off-school for typhoon.

According to residents' state, the typhoon of island brings huge damage. So most of stores which beside the beach road were covered by light wooden board on their windows. The typhoon warning did not bit, the Lord made it weak, so we did not have any damage. The Lord gave us holidays for the sick of us.

On Wednesday, we started a shout week well even though our body could not adjust the everyday schedule. We checked our pronunciation, listening and writing. In this week, it has been hard for me to taking note in my small and silent room on cloudy days. Maybe I should find out my own way to study efficiently, and study straight to the end of this semester. It would be time to study by myself. I used to want to review adding something what I need to memorize for me last semester, but studying by myself was not easy even now the time came.

During the two off days, I watched the CD of Jump Pusan. M. Kim stated the revival history of Korean church and current mission achievements. He empathized that this is time for revival. I have got to see what God has done in my country, and the entire world. So that the importance of revival of the Gospel got big in my mind. Especially in my heart. The real revival makes us live denying ourselves on the cross. The Gospel is the truth like burning fire in our heart. The Hope of Jesus' return gives us abundant energy to be faithful.

Then Deborah said to Barak, "Go! This is the day the LORD has given Sisera into your hands. Has not the LORD gone ahead of you?" So Barak went down Mount Tabor, followed by then thousand men. (Judges 4:14)

Even though the glory of killing Sisera in hand could not be given to Barak, he obeyed God simply no matter what is his weakness and situation because God had already been in the fight place. There is nothing but trusting completely. Through the servants who go through by faith in the Bible and here, God arouse me from being weary by opposition in myself.

Even many students who study English in cyber Jungchul say, "You need tenacity for mastery of English." God says "You can do it. Do not tell 'cannot' about what God told 'can' about it." How come the Lord's power cannot break through everything? I prayed that He should let me stay with full of faith and hope but not empty in the Friday prayer service. There is a big difference between just being calm and being silent for hope of the Lord and faith. Thinking of Jesus who would come soon, I renew my mind up!

Current School Life

I got one more thing that makes me happy to go to G. school. It is right first graders! For two weeks, I was making small gifts for them. Even after teacher-aide, I could not forget their faces. As soon as turn from them, I want to see them again. Then, at the beginning of last week, I remembered one day that I helped them doing art works. They liked the drawing I drew even it is very simple. So I planned to give them some paper token what I drew. But it was not so easy. And it has made me remind their faces and pray for them.

Many faces of all first graders came up in my mind, and it was so wonderful! God must be please to listen to my prayer for them. So I could draw their faces along their different looks. It took more than a week. I gave them the tokens in this week. Cute first graders! They love it. (Their homeroom teacher told me about it.)

I cannot be with them over their whole lives, even one semester. In my prayer, I am worrying about them. 'How would they go forth?' 'What kinds of person would their parents?' 'What would they see?' 'How could they meet the gospel and born again?' But I have been praying for their lives to be saved and changed. I could not do for them anything. So I contained my prayer and hope for them on my token.

I see junior high students at school. I see them at every chapel time once on a week. I was glad to see some teenagers who I met at a out-reach leading the worship time last Wednesday. During that chapel, I hoped that students who love Jesus and follow their pastor at YO** become some changer in junior high. The holy desire that wants to follow the Lord could be spread to every student.

By the way, in this week there were many sick persons in my class. Sarah has already known for her face and stomach, and shalom fell down at the stair down to 1 floor and sprained her ankle. Even Joseph has been being sick for two days. Joses needs to have some rest and Judy has tired and been sick. I hope them would be okay soon.

Especially as for Sarah, we are continuing to pray for her. God gave her a good time. I think He will renew not only her body but soul and mind.

Realizing the Prayer requests for Youth

 

I determined to attend to YO** out-reach. When Shalom required us to spend a night at that out-reach with her, I could not decide, but the Lord gave me not a pressed heart but a desire that want to be challenged. That challenge was not for testing my ability or English speaking skill. I wanted to know more the prayer needs of youth on Saipan that I just used to hear about it in person. I thought that they would not like to let me join them so that it would need a lot of trying, but I wanted to go there to go through those matters.

This out-reach did not need so big help, because there were some events that students planned and some of the members were already senior. Several teachers of junior high have come, too. The youth have just needed prayer for them and the pathway that the Lord can work in them through it. Even though we can not be visible help, Pastor F. would get great blessing that we are there, observe them and pray for them eagerly.

If the Pastor makes groups in them and let them pray themselves, they pray together. And they listened to preacher more or less. But as soon as the worship service over, they returned to totally free. So I felt strange feeling looking at them, but I could understand them. If there are students honest more, they would be confused themselves worshiping with another appearance. There were a girl who keeps her self-respect, a girl who enjoys some music singing strange lyrics and some teenagers who have lots of skin ship each other and wear low-cut dresses. There words were very fast and have a lot of slangs so that it was hard to listen them. It was hard more to sit calm and talk with them. But a girl with whom I could talk with in chance permitted was always preacher of gospel in school even she was young as least fifteen years old. She had a broken family and goes to a public school, but she accepted the Lord seriously. I was surprised for the girl who lives in Kag***.

I wanted to listen them all and to know them more. But the beginning of that relationship was not easy. However, I could be with them playing and running funny with them at night. I needed to try more as much as it is hard. Shortly after the starting, I was enjoying it. Inexpertly, I could see their pretty heart that willing to let me join them.

Even though their favorite music and movie drove me crazy and I had few of fear at first, but I have got to know and love them more seeing them some times. (At the C. Jamboree at the Kag*** church) I think attending this out-reach was very good choice! I had a headache and several showy scenes in my thoughts in the Saturday morning but I believed that the Lord would work in them by our prayers even I can see only one aside of them, now. I could not know God's great, deep and wonderful plan but the Lord has worked during that short time. Above all, He gave me some prayers about the teenagers, Pastor and teachers in my heart. I am going to pray in hope of new wind of gospel that the Lord would give it in them.

 

Visiting another town with brothers

It was the first time that I have been to Kag***. I did not know where Joseph goes every Tuesday. Miss HT. told me that Pastor R. wants to build the churches in the west, east, south and north on Saipan, last Saturday. I could not understand it by the time I visit Kag***. It was so far from G.

They called it 'out-reach'. I did not know why they call that meeting like that. I have got to learn the reason when this jamboree over. There were about 60 children. A girl of the church told me less than seven children come to church every Sunday. The Kag*** G church might has invited a lot of children in the town. They invite them every beginning of a school year, then sing some worship songs together, give them face painting and gifts, play games, and share a simple message and supper. After watch all of these, I could understand why its name is out-reach. They were reaching many unbelievers through this opportunity.

There is a public school in the K. town. Through message, Miss HT. encouraged the children not to be afraid of facing new semester because of the Lord who is with them. Some girls sitting beside me were getting encouragement.

The members of C. jamboree were encouraged, too. Because of two brothers-Joseph and Joses were with us. Of course, there were not so many things to do, but I was helped by them who just went there together. And we could know more how we serve and where we go each other. We have got to learn how much precious matters we are serving.

A woman who looks leader of the church led throughout the out-reach. Her husband and she were keeping the place of sowing the seed of prayer in that church. We met her daughters, too. Two of them were the girls whom I met at the YO** out-reach. I could know they are faithful in that church. I came to appreciate them. I hope them just be there with praying for the people in that town.

The children would be encouraged to come to the church through this opportunity, too. I hope nothing is flown but the Good News to the town through the church. I bless the town in His grace.

Preparation for Race of 6 months

Praying for new semester, I realized that we need prayer more and more. I thought we do not have appropriate sense for plan of next semester. But God led me to fix my eyes on Him only as I pray for another six months. So before last Monday, I determined to trust and obey teacher and leader absolutely again. Therefore, I could shut every possibility that wrong thoughts can come. Then I became vibrant, prepared and confident by faith in the Lord.

Differently with my thought and preparation, this week was so quiet and not tight so. It was a preparing week and calm because of note taking. J Even though we were silent, God made my mind more steadfast passing this week.

For who knows what is good for a man in life, during the few and meaningless days he passes through like a shadow? Who can tell him what will happen under the sun after he is gone? Then I saw all that God has done. No one can comprehend what goes on under the sun. Despite all his efforts to search it out, man cannot discover its meaning. Even if a wise man claims he knows, he cannot really comprehend it.

(Ecclesiastes 6:12, 8:17)

In meditation of Ecclesiastes, I have got to pay attention to my and all people's limit point and wisdom in the Lord's sight. God's trial is really good gift and help. When I am hesitating to make my mind up, it helps me make it quickly. Before now I used to think that some suffering gives me lots of growing in Christ and benefit for my soul. But I did not want to ask for the difficulty like that. I have only wanted to avoid it.

But I can welcome a hard time now since I have admit my fault what God said through the trial He have given to me. And I know the good works what the Lord wants to do in me for making me completed as an image of Him. It is possible in the truth and His power. Praise the Lord, Almighty God!!

When I learn not taking through the slide from a famous college, I surprised at their preparation for not taking and studying. Sleep, food, exercise habits and belief should be controlled all. I thought I need to be prepared to concentrate to our eternal purpose. Therefore I will not be afraid of any circumstances. God gives us many new and challengeable situations and chances lately. Most of them come through several activities in G. I am totally in a training course of God. I am trying to pass the test from God in faith by His power. I thank God for giving power of faith, and I will concentrate to the completion of the Great Mission without any disturbing stuff.

First 6 months reflection – Beautiful way of the Lord

I praise the Lord for moved me to be here and teaching so many precious things! I can not measure how much I have blessed for six months. It was a course takes six months for English. We just came here thinking one thing that it is the time to be spread to other nations, so that we need to be able to communicate and unit with not only Korean, but also English speakers. But God has retrained us as World mobile missionaries over our understanding. That was what God had given in our hearts when we prayed in Korea preparing this ESL course before left Korea. We could never know what would be the plan for learning English on Saipan. We did not know anything about here even Judy, our teacher. God required us to step on the way which we have never walked on. Each one of new situations made me look up the goodness of God with whole heart again. It have awaked my soul and revealed the place where my life of faith is.

Before I started grammar study, I had to destroy some knowledge of English that I had built until 3 years ago and rebuild foundation of English. It was very hard to make the foundation firm as much as I cursed my own pronunciation I have had in Korea. I have had hard time that requires daily patience and faith on Him. Even if I practiced phonics every day and night, yet sometimes any improving does not seen from me. But if I have pure faith in the Lord like little child's, it would be on the easy way that I do not need to do anything but just follow. God let me look at myself who am proud of worldly values, fear being rebuked, have hard mind, not listen to any discipline, not acknowledge God and am afraid of people in many tired circumstances. The truth of Gospel was not realized in my personal life as my life even though I thought it has done. I could not say anything but confess my shames.

But the hard time was God's grace for me, because I have misunderstood that I have grew up much, now. I thought that I have already been experienced many things in truth and have already got many knowledge of God. The greatest grace of God is leading me to convict my sin, repent, and make up my mind. I was not able to know some parts of my life that the scripture can not move it. The Rota outreach was God's gift for not only learning and speaking English, but also making me humble. In love, God show me a great witness of Him and challenged me. Of course speaking English became more natural to me when I speak it in Rota Island. But one thing getting clear as I learn English is that this is not for my honor, but for the God's work toward whole world.

The most important thing is not how much I use English language well, but what I do with that. The Lord wants me just be faithful to Him. Even at a small day, I want to be sincere because the Lord called me to live the small day. The one who called me to follow Him and gives me every single faith and strength for obedience is the Lord Jesus Christ. I have made my mind not to think other things except the purpose that God gave me. I have fixed on my eyes the day that Jesus will come again and my Jesus Christ.

I pray for guiding me to be a solder of Christ more. I expect God who will lead me jump in any situation with faith because I believe that I can not do anything by my own ability but He can do everything. And I please to help any God's working and praying. He will reap the fruit after we sow day by day.

Had fun on Saturday

The member of jamboree got together again after had pauses two times, on last Saturday. A one-year-old baby’s birthday party was held at a beach. On the way to the beach, a man who was driving asked the phone number through the car window. Miss HT let him know G phone number. He was with his son beside him. The little boy’s birthday must be much closed. “How can he ask us phone number? He does not know us at all.” I was surprised. But I could know that he could know her the coordinator of the jamboree because of her making up as a clown.
“They requires jamboree with this way, it is very fun.” I thought. I thought everyone in Saipan knows this. But they could not do.

The birthday party was supposed to start at noon, but it was delayed again and again even though somebody was making barbecue when we arrived at that beach. We were waiting for the host of that party making balloon toy for some children. (There were two students whom Grace and I have been in same classroom for a month. :D) The birthday baby’s mother apologized to us for being late. We smiled to them and told them it would be okay.

We could not have typical C. Jamboree. We have just had a couple of games, puppet songs and face painting. Shortly after the party began, they let us go. Today’s party was very short to me because they started it late. The baby’s father wanted us bring some food but Miss HT. rejected politely and we did not.

That might challenge the baby’s parents. (I heard the word ‘challenge’ from Miss HT.’s saying, but it is not clear. I just guessed it.)

I am not to sure what was why she refused. I do not know what God has put in their mind through us. But I do not care. I will just obey. Even though I tried doing my best as a helper with anxiety, I am sure God has done things He wants. And the next time I attend, I will do everything with full of confidence of the Lord. I want to share our life and communicate with them by faith only. I won’t care how much I can speak English well, but will care how much God has spoke to me so far.

In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven. (Matt. 5:16)

Leaving the classroom

One day, I was watching first graders attending class sitting back of classroom. Everytime the teacher asked questions, they raised their hands enthusiastically. When teacher pointed one boy, he hesitated to answer, for he did not know the answer. If teacher asks something they know, some students raised their hands stamping their feet. I could not repress to laugh. I could know why they act like that. Since I know them all one by one, I could discover the characteristic of each one of them from their reactions. Even though I could not know them perfectly, a month with them helped me to know and love them. Now I came to know how I can help the teacher and students.

But we have just five days on a week, in additional, we were going to have WMM meeting on Friday. Teacher asked me for the last day a lot. But I could not let her know before the last day; even she wanted to make it special. I was so sorry to face the last week, and to be late to tell our plan. I could let her know about it on the last day. The teacher was planning a little party for us, so she wrote that the students need to bring extra snack on the board. The party was canceled.

I could say good bye my cute students, then they gave me big hugs each. I was sooooooo happy. I was so sorry to cancel the good bye party to teacher, but that happiness let everything sank.

I want to see them as soon as they go home. But praying for them is better than missing them. Saying bye to them was like that I let go them to unknown, dangerous world. Because I do not know who their parents are, what matters they will face forth in their future are even whether their parents are Christians or not. So I had to command them to the Lord who knows each one of them all their life in this earth. I have made small circled cards for them by today. I have written my prayer and wish toward them on it. God will work in their hearts and minds. I have pleased to help G through which God is doing his own works.

The children still like to see me when I am nearby them in the school. But I thought that I need not to see them without the teacher for her and them. Yet I am still missing them.

Teacher-aide was so hard as much as I must eat snack everyday but it was the gift from God. Praise the Lord for He has broke my thoughts, own energy and plan but used me in His way with giving humble, poor heart in me. The lovely kids are in my heart and prayers.