I praise the Lord for moved me to be here and teaching so many precious things! I can not measure how much I have blessed for six months. It was a course takes six months for English. We just came here thinking one thing that it is the time to be spread to other nations, so that we need to be able to communicate and unit with not only Korean, but also English speakers. But God has retrained us as World mobile missionaries over our understanding. That was what God had given in our hearts when we prayed in Korea preparing this ESL course before left Korea. We could never know what would be the plan for learning English on Saipan. We did not know anything about here even Judy, our teacher. God required us to step on the way which we have never walked on. Each one of new situations made me look up the goodness of God with whole heart again. It have awaked my soul and revealed the place where my life of faith is.
Before I started grammar study, I had to destroy some knowledge of English that I had built until 3 years ago and rebuild foundation of English. It was very hard to make the foundation firm as much as I cursed my own pronunciation I have had in Korea. I have had hard time that requires daily patience and faith on Him. Even if I practiced phonics every day and night, yet sometimes any improving does not seen from me. But if I have pure faith in the Lord like little child's, it would be on the easy way that I do not need to do anything but just follow. God let me look at myself who am proud of worldly values, fear being rebuked, have hard mind, not listen to any discipline, not acknowledge God and am afraid of people in many tired circumstances. The truth of Gospel was not realized in my personal life as my life even though I thought it has done. I could not say anything but confess my shames.
But the hard time was God's grace for me, because I have misunderstood that I have grew up much, now. I thought that I have already been experienced many things in truth and have already got many knowledge of God. The greatest grace of God is leading me to convict my sin, repent, and make up my mind. I was not able to know some parts of my life that the scripture can not move it. The Rota outreach was God's gift for not only learning and speaking English, but also making me humble. In love, God show me a great witness of Him and challenged me. Of course speaking English became more natural to me when I speak it in Rota Island. But one thing getting clear as I learn English is that this is not for my honor, but for the God's work toward whole world.
The most important thing is not how much I use English language well, but what I do with that. The Lord wants me just be faithful to Him. Even at a small day, I want to be sincere because the Lord called me to live the small day. The one who called me to follow Him and gives me every single faith and strength for obedience is the Lord Jesus Christ. I have made my mind not to think other things except the purpose that God gave me. I have fixed on my eyes the day that Jesus will come again and my Jesus Christ.
I pray for guiding me to be a solder of Christ more. I expect God who will lead me jump in any situation with faith because I believe that I can not do anything by my own ability but He can do everything. And I please to help any God's working and praying. He will reap the fruit after we sow day by day.
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